Anorexia left me minutes from death: I want to use my second chance to help others

In June this year I collapsed at home and was minutes away from dying. My body had shut down because of my anorexia - and it was only the timely intervention of my wife and the speedy work from paramedics which kept me alive.

It is a miracle I'm still alive: Naomi was due to be out that day but cancelled her plans and was around when I collapsed. I was meant to be on my way to London in a car - if I had gotten in then I would have died in there.

If the paramedics hadn't been on the scene in minutes then it would have been too late. They reckon I was 30 minutes away from not surviving.



I have previously documented the reasons on this blog why things reached this stage - including numerous NHS failures, many of which have continued since - but that is not the reason for this post.

I have told almost nobody how close I came to dying because I didn't want to share it, not even with my closest friends. But I've come to realise this isn't about me any more, it's about using the second chance I've been given to help others.

How? By continuing to shine a spotlight on the shoddy treatment people with anorexia (and other eating disorders) receive from the NHS across the country, which I have done a lot on and hope to do more on soon.

But also, to raise money for charity. 

Anorexia twists your brain and turns you into a different person (think Frodo and Gollum in Lord of the Rings with the One Ring!) and the only way I feel I can defeat it is by seeking inspiration and getting a new purpose in life which overcomes the desire to constantly lose weight.

For this reason, I am going to devote a lot of my time and effort into supporting Chance to Shine's work to support young people in Peterborough.

The charity works in state schools and under-served communities to deliver best-in-class cricket programmes for youngsters aged 5 to 24. Last year, it spent £13,000 in Peterborough to make sure more young people got the chance to sample this wonderful sport.

I have set up a JustGiving page and will soon be holding a raffle to raise money - https://www.justgiving.com/page/joel-lamy-1. 

It's only because of Naomi's love and support that I am now getting proper inpatient treatment for my mental illness. 

I know it's the right place for to be, but I am absolutely terrified and the treatment is brutal. I can't leave my room, I'm supervised every minute of every day, I have a meal plan which is making me gain weight rapidly and painfully, with food having to be eat at certain times, while liquids are strictly limited (so few cups of tea). 

I'm currently away from my family, isolated and have no idea what the future holds. And with my chronic pain and severe IBS my anxiety is in complete overdrive. The pain was so bad yesterday I collapsed onto my bed and could not move or talk for hours.

That is why I'm asking for your support. Messages are nice, but they won't help when I'm all alone at night, miles away from my family, confronting weight gain, stomach pain and wondering if the suffering will ever stop.

What I want is for people to help get raffle prizes, to donate if they can, and to help make a difference in the lives of those less fortunate. With all the rubbish going on in the world it would be great to show that when we come together (think Royal Weddings, major sporting events and national emergencies) we can do amazing things.

If there is literally anything you can do to help please let me know, whether it's sharing this on a Facebook page or with friends or family, helping to get more raffle prizes, organising a fundraising event or even reaching out to people with a huge online reach to see if they can offer their support. Any of that would be amazing.

If anything good can come from this horrible episode, then it will give me strength to keep going.

Thank you for reading this, and to my wife and daughter, thank you for your love and support, and I hope daddy will be home soon.

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